MirandaDevine.com

Brendan Nelson is a raging spunk of a hunk (Photo: ABC News)
Glorious middle Australians, I apologise for the dearth of words flowing lately from the fountain of righteousness that is my pen. You see, I am now an official member of the Brendan Nelson entourage. I am Miranda Devine, War Correspondent de la droit! It [...]

This cannot be happening.
Something is wrong here.
The prophecy is incorrect and my gloriously correct view of the world has been thrown into a state of quiet calamity.
Late last week, Greg McCleay was an ordinary Middle Australian. A glorious Middle Australian: the kind of Middle Australian that my weekly Nobel Prize-worthy dissertations exalt on the pedestal [...]

Iraq (Photo: US Army’s Soldiers Media Center)
Listen up, naysayers, civil rights barristers, leftist bananabending cyclists and queer communist sympathisers. For too long you have gorged yourselves at the table of the naive bleeding-hearts, cramming your stomachs full of tofu and kidney beans and celery juice whilst decrying the “problems” with Australia’s involvement in Iraq and [...]

Photo by Michela
The staff at Villawood Immigration Detention Centre (glorious guardians of our way of life that they are) continue to dazzle me with their fantastic innovations.
Not content with their ingenious and thrifty measures of encouraging detainees to sew their mouths shut, thus saving Middle Australians tax payer millions of dollars on porridge and toothpaste, [...]

Un-Australian nancy-boys pledging support to Ms Devine
Being an intellectual person who enjoys keeping up with all things intellectual, I just finished reading The Kite Runner. An excellent book. Whoever the fellow was that picked the pen name “Khaled Hosseini” to author this book obviously has a sense of irony that is almost as delicious [...]

After the so-called “exoneration” of that kebab-eating, beard-growing, tetanus-injecting Doctor of Death, Mohamed “ROFLCOPTER” Haneef, and his flight from the glorious shores of Middle Australia, all I have to say about the matter is this:
He left because he was guilty.
Thanks to my highly investigative journalism, I believe we can put the Haneef case to bed [...]

Haneef meets with his idol and mentor, Osama Bin Laden
Mohammed Haneef, or “Doctor Darkie” as some sections of the media are calling him, was let loose on an unsuspecting Brisbane community earlier this week. The man who (allegedly) wilfully provided material support to cold-blooded terrorist would-be murderers is now free to hand out sim cards [...]

Ladies and gentlemen, I knew they would finally see it my way!
It appears I have a Facebook fansite!!! Glorious. What’s more, the membership consists solely of leftist, raging homosexual banana-bending arts students who have taken the time out of their pilates regime to read my articles and finally see the light. They have even posted [...]

BIke Riding Vegan Lesbian’s Toilet (source: Jared and Corin)
Every now and then I climb off the pedestal and engage in some serious investigative journalism. Not that I really need to - from up here, in the company of the literary greats, I can spot the bike riding vegan lesbians as they engage in their day-to-day [...]

Hold on to your hairpieces: I’m back! That’s right - I, Miranda Esmerelda Gloriosa Diamond Agapantha Devine, have returned from my self-imposed exile from the world of the internet.
For the past month or so I have been involved in one of the most exciting, intense, undercover investigative journalism investigations since Ray Martin’s heroic investigation of [...]